Last night I had the joy of returning to a volunteer role with the Multicultural Refugee Coalition here in Austin. I get such joy from working with refugees. But, I also get a renewed perspective of the realities of this world and how easy I have it.
The reality check always starts off innocently.
Last night, I was helping a man from the Congo find job openings and fill out applications on line. He's been in the US for 3 years and recently lost his job at a warehouse due to layoffs (he is supporting a family of 7). As we found appropriate jobs and filled out the applications, I became painfully aware of how something as "simple" as filling out a job application can be quite challenging for a refugee -- even for one who speaks English well, as this man does [in fact, he is fluent in 5 languages (while I just work on mastering English)]!
This was frustrating, but not surprising -- the reality check had not yet arrived.
Admittedly, the online application processes are, well honestly, pretty stupid. You can't just upload a resume -- each application is unique unto itself, so for every single job it was necessary to redo the process we had just spend 30 minutes completing on another site. And, most of these sites are not user-friendly or intuitive. So, if you are slightly older or if English is not your first language, well... good luck. It has nothing to do with whether or not this man is qualified for the actual job. It was merely that someone had some great ideas about how to turn what used to be a simple process of filling out a one-page application and attaching a resume into a electronically "enhanced" (using term very lightly here) process that features a multitude of questions, pages of forms and the possibility of having the site get hung up at a variety of stages, losing some or all information painstakingly provided over the last 30 minutes (which happened to us twice).
But this wasn't the reality check. It was still hovering. Waiting....
Admittedly, I was saddened that in the course of 1.5 hours we were only able to make it through 2.5 applications. I know full well that this is only one of the challenges refugees face when trying to provide for their families and learn the ropes, so to speak, of the U.S. And, I'm sure this challenge is not only faced by refugees but thousands of Americans who are out of work right now and just trying to apply for jobs. It really should be easier.
But, honestly, this was not the actual reality check for me either. That came while we were filling out the third online application...
On this particular application, each previous job had to be entered separately. For each we had to indicate why he no longer worked there. This question had a drop down list to select your answer from. The list included many options, e.g., lay-off, dispute with manager, took better opportunity, etc. We input his most recent job -- reason for leaving: "Lay off". We input the one before that (reason = better opportunity), and so on. We were required to account for his employment over the last 10 years, which included, in his case, 5 jobs.
So then came the perspective...
As we got to the job he left in 2002, we came upon the inevitable question we had reached on the previous 4 jobs I had entered into the application for him:
What was your reason for leaving this job?
His answer: "War".
That option wasn't on the drop down list.
Reality check. Perspective. We have it so good and, most days, we don't even realize it.
Friday, August 19, 2011
Friday, April 30, 2010
Life keeps moving on....
Shame on me that it has been more than A YEAR since I posted to my blog. I find it tough when I'm in the middle of things to stop and journal (which is basically what a blog is). But it is also so cathartic to do so. This past year has had many challenges. I embraced the journey God had me on with Refugee Connect, but ended up encountering a lot of closed doors and many internal questions about my own wiring. I have a do it all kind of attitude, but am not programmed to do it all (none of us are). Yet, the ministry I undertook left me needing to do it all. The funding did not come. Volunteer support did not come. Encouragement came, which is why I continued on the path for a year. But those encouraging did not, or were not in a position to, jump in and take part. So, after a year, I recognized I was still doing it mostly alone and didn't believe that is how God wires us. I crave to be a part of a team. I do not want to spend most of my days working alone with my computer.
This led me to return to my constant fall back... freelance marketing. I actually find that I'm naturally good at it and I enjoy the days that I get to interact with my clients. But, many days, it is just me and my computer. So, I'm still working that one out with God. And I know He'll show me the way if I'm willing to keep my eyes, ears, and heart open.
Our most recent learning is that God is leading us to become adoptive parents! John and I start the process on Monday with our first class that is part of 30 hours of training to be licensed to adopt. We are planning to adopt a pre-teen as there are so many in our area who need a "forever family." God has touched our heart with the story of one particular boy. But I won't go into that yet as I don't want to get ahead of Him.
I admit, at times the uncertainty of following Christ is a bit scary. We can't always see the next steps and sometimes the direction just doesn't make sense. Or, what I find to be my bad habit, is that I apply my own understanding to something and interpret what God must be doing. Then when it all ends up looking different I feel so confused. What's that scripture? Ah yes, "lean not on your own understanding"! The full verse is Prov 3:5-6 "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."
So, for now (and hopefully for always), I'm looking to God to direct my path. I am wondering what's next but open to the lessons. After all, I am a work in progress. :0)
This led me to return to my constant fall back... freelance marketing. I actually find that I'm naturally good at it and I enjoy the days that I get to interact with my clients. But, many days, it is just me and my computer. So, I'm still working that one out with God. And I know He'll show me the way if I'm willing to keep my eyes, ears, and heart open.
Our most recent learning is that God is leading us to become adoptive parents! John and I start the process on Monday with our first class that is part of 30 hours of training to be licensed to adopt. We are planning to adopt a pre-teen as there are so many in our area who need a "forever family." God has touched our heart with the story of one particular boy. But I won't go into that yet as I don't want to get ahead of Him.
I admit, at times the uncertainty of following Christ is a bit scary. We can't always see the next steps and sometimes the direction just doesn't make sense. Or, what I find to be my bad habit, is that I apply my own understanding to something and interpret what God must be doing. Then when it all ends up looking different I feel so confused. What's that scripture? Ah yes, "lean not on your own understanding"! The full verse is Prov 3:5-6 "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."
So, for now (and hopefully for always), I'm looking to God to direct my path. I am wondering what's next but open to the lessons. After all, I am a work in progress. :0)
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
More Than I Can Handle
I often hear fellow Christians (and myself at times) state: "God won't give me more than I can handle." I realized today that we are stopping that statement shy of the truth. The truth is, God will not give me more than I can handle without His help. I believe that it is because He loves us so much that He actually will give us (or at least allow us to experience) more than we can handle on our own; because when we cannot handle it, we turn to Him. He does this out of love as He desires this relationship with us and it is in partnership with Him that we can do (and handle) so much more than we can without Him.
Think of all of the biblical heroes who cried out to God and He helped them do more than they thought they possibly could. Could a young virgin have dealt with an unexplainable pregnancy without Him? Could a young Jewish woman have stood up for her people to her husband, the king, risking almost certain death? Could a man lead the Jews out of captivity without drowning them in the Red Sea when pursued by the Egyptians? Could a man who stoned Christians have become the founder of so many churches and author of several books of the bible? Could a carpenter have taken on the sins of the world and saved us all? Not without HIM.
Another thing happens when God asks us to take on more than we can handle... when we are successful, when we do overcome the challenges, He is glorified. For there is no question that what was done was not of our own ability. There is no question that He was with us every step of the way.
So the next time you have more than you can handle, praise God and ask Him to work with you in it knowing that with Him and through Him you too can handle whatever He asks of you. And when you want to grow closer to Him, take a risk and actually invite Him to give you more than you could possibly handle without His help. My prayer for all of us who follow Christ is that God will use each of us to do a work that is more than we can possibly do on our own and, in so doing, we will grow closer to Him and the world will know He is at work in us.
Think of all of the biblical heroes who cried out to God and He helped them do more than they thought they possibly could. Could a young virgin have dealt with an unexplainable pregnancy without Him? Could a young Jewish woman have stood up for her people to her husband, the king, risking almost certain death? Could a man lead the Jews out of captivity without drowning them in the Red Sea when pursued by the Egyptians? Could a man who stoned Christians have become the founder of so many churches and author of several books of the bible? Could a carpenter have taken on the sins of the world and saved us all? Not without HIM.
Another thing happens when God asks us to take on more than we can handle... when we are successful, when we do overcome the challenges, He is glorified. For there is no question that what was done was not of our own ability. There is no question that He was with us every step of the way.
So the next time you have more than you can handle, praise God and ask Him to work with you in it knowing that with Him and through Him you too can handle whatever He asks of you. And when you want to grow closer to Him, take a risk and actually invite Him to give you more than you could possibly handle without His help. My prayer for all of us who follow Christ is that God will use each of us to do a work that is more than we can possibly do on our own and, in so doing, we will grow closer to Him and the world will know He is at work in us.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Just Know....
OK Lord. I’m going to share this struggle. I have to first admit that it is very challenging for me to do so before I see how You work it all out as I feel I’m not giving You glory and perhaps creating critics. But I have to trust You with the outcome and not take responsibility for the reactions of those who read this. I had known that things would not necessarily just be a straight line from the day I responded to Your call to leave my role at Gateway to the day things “fell into place” for my new role working as a faith coordinator in the refugee community. But knowing and experiencing are two very different things…
About 2 weeks ago, you began to prepare me for the first hiccup. Through my reading of “Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World”, you led me to Mark 4:35-41 where the disciples are freaking out as a storm is coming and Jesus is asleep in the front of the boat. They wake Jesus. He calms the storm but then asks them why they freaked out and says they have little faith. What I took from that scripture is that You are always at work for our good even when we can’t see it. But what I also took away is that You expect us to trust that You are always at work for our good even when we can’t see it. This scripture was reiterated to me a couple of days later through another question in the bible study portion of the book. Then you demonstrated it to me when a friend shared something that You did in her life, that could only have been You and that showed You had been at work in a situation for 6 months, even though she couldn’t always see what You were doing on her behalf.
So when I talked with International Teams (ITeams) later that same week I had to take this verse to heart. ITeams shared that although they are very happy with my application to do this ministry work in Austin through them and my references were all good, they need to put me on hold as they search for a new director for their Refugee Ministry division. I could not pout or get upset… I had no choice but to expect that You are at work for my good in this even if I don’t yet see what You are doing. And I truly had a peace with that. However, I did find myself wondering what it was You were expecting next of me since I now was not clear on how to raise support without an organization for folks to donate that support to.
What was on my heart next was to share with 2 folks from 2 different churches the situation with ITeams and ask them for assistance in identifying an organization that would allow me to have my support go through them, at least temporarily. I also felt led to share that You’d put on my heart that I was to have/raise $35,000 start up funds for this new Austin ministry You were having me step into. That was a huge faith step for me. My mind was thinking of all the things they’d think of me: was I crazy thinking God had told me this was the money I was to raise; did they think I was a fake and it was really about the money; would they decide not to support the work they had seemed so enthusiastic about when we’d last talked; would they feel my seeking their assistance was a veiled attempt at getting them to provide funding. So many scary thoughts, but I sent the emails and then waited. To date I had one response, which did provide a suggestion for an organization that might help but was short and didn’t address any of the questions or details I had shared. I have not heard back from the other church.
I had also reached back out to my contact at ITeams as I had thought that it would make sense for me to still continue with the application process so that when the new director came on board we would be ready to move forward with this ministry in Austin as soon as he/she gave the thumbs up. I have to admit, his response was less enthusiastic than I’d expected. He has seemed so motivated to get me connected to ITeams for so long now. So the sense I got from his email of that he is now ok with the possibility that that might not happen was really unnerving for me. He didn’t do anything wrong and in no way told me that this wouldn’t move forward, but there was a change in tone that really threw me.
So, here I sit, the Sunday before my last week on staff at Gateway. I am trusting that God is at work in all of this. But, I also have this underlying anxiety over having absolutely no idea what He wants me to do next. I don’t want to get out in front of His plans. But I also don’t want to miss a step He is asking me to take. And, I know we need to pay bills. I do trust He will provide. I’m just not sure what that will look like and, to be honest, that is a bit freaky.
This is the time when all sorts of lies could go through my head and are certainly trying to. So, this is the time when I have to block those out with the voice of Truth. God has led me to this exact point on the path and I have to trust Him with next steps even though I can’t see what they are. Be still and know. Stop striving and know. Just know.
About 2 weeks ago, you began to prepare me for the first hiccup. Through my reading of “Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World”, you led me to Mark 4:35-41 where the disciples are freaking out as a storm is coming and Jesus is asleep in the front of the boat. They wake Jesus. He calms the storm but then asks them why they freaked out and says they have little faith. What I took from that scripture is that You are always at work for our good even when we can’t see it. But what I also took away is that You expect us to trust that You are always at work for our good even when we can’t see it. This scripture was reiterated to me a couple of days later through another question in the bible study portion of the book. Then you demonstrated it to me when a friend shared something that You did in her life, that could only have been You and that showed You had been at work in a situation for 6 months, even though she couldn’t always see what You were doing on her behalf.
So when I talked with International Teams (ITeams) later that same week I had to take this verse to heart. ITeams shared that although they are very happy with my application to do this ministry work in Austin through them and my references were all good, they need to put me on hold as they search for a new director for their Refugee Ministry division. I could not pout or get upset… I had no choice but to expect that You are at work for my good in this even if I don’t yet see what You are doing. And I truly had a peace with that. However, I did find myself wondering what it was You were expecting next of me since I now was not clear on how to raise support without an organization for folks to donate that support to.
What was on my heart next was to share with 2 folks from 2 different churches the situation with ITeams and ask them for assistance in identifying an organization that would allow me to have my support go through them, at least temporarily. I also felt led to share that You’d put on my heart that I was to have/raise $35,000 start up funds for this new Austin ministry You were having me step into. That was a huge faith step for me. My mind was thinking of all the things they’d think of me: was I crazy thinking God had told me this was the money I was to raise; did they think I was a fake and it was really about the money; would they decide not to support the work they had seemed so enthusiastic about when we’d last talked; would they feel my seeking their assistance was a veiled attempt at getting them to provide funding. So many scary thoughts, but I sent the emails and then waited. To date I had one response, which did provide a suggestion for an organization that might help but was short and didn’t address any of the questions or details I had shared. I have not heard back from the other church.
I had also reached back out to my contact at ITeams as I had thought that it would make sense for me to still continue with the application process so that when the new director came on board we would be ready to move forward with this ministry in Austin as soon as he/she gave the thumbs up. I have to admit, his response was less enthusiastic than I’d expected. He has seemed so motivated to get me connected to ITeams for so long now. So the sense I got from his email of that he is now ok with the possibility that that might not happen was really unnerving for me. He didn’t do anything wrong and in no way told me that this wouldn’t move forward, but there was a change in tone that really threw me.
So, here I sit, the Sunday before my last week on staff at Gateway. I am trusting that God is at work in all of this. But, I also have this underlying anxiety over having absolutely no idea what He wants me to do next. I don’t want to get out in front of His plans. But I also don’t want to miss a step He is asking me to take. And, I know we need to pay bills. I do trust He will provide. I’m just not sure what that will look like and, to be honest, that is a bit freaky.
This is the time when all sorts of lies could go through my head and are certainly trying to. So, this is the time when I have to block those out with the voice of Truth. God has led me to this exact point on the path and I have to trust Him with next steps even though I can’t see what they are. Be still and know. Stop striving and know. Just know.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Contemplating 38
I wonder what my mom was thinking on this night 38 years ago. Probably, "Get this thing out of me!" Aside from being tired of being 9 months pregnant, I wonder what she was feeling. I was to be her first child. She likley didn't even know I'd be a girl as they didn't learn the gender before birth back then. Did she have a sense I would be a girl? Did she have an idea of who I'd become? Did she know that I'd reject the name she picked out for me in 30 years and go by "Kaylee" for the rest of my life?
What has Mom thought since that day? How have these 38 years looked to her? I guess I need to ask her to find out, but heck, it is so much more fun to just guess. I'm thinking she has seen a lot of changes in me since birth. I'm certainly taller now. But I figure she might also say I'm very much the same girl I was when I was little. After all, God knit me in her womb to be, well... me. I think Mom probably saw some of the qualities I have been blessed to possess in my being from an early age. And, I bet she'd share with y'all if you care to ask ways that I exhibited then a few of the less attractive traits I still possess today.
So what has this journey of 38 years been about if I am still Kaylee -- the same Kaylee (although Mom called me Courtney) that Mom gave birth to 38 years ago tomorrow? I think it has been about getting to know my Father God, and myself better each day. Life makes so much more sense looking backwards they say and I think "they" are right. I knew God the day I was born, after all, Christ was my first love, but I didn't really know Him or who I was in Him. Each day I learn that a little more -- who He is and who I am in Him. It is an exciting journey of self discovery and God discovery. It is all so much more than I could ever have imagined and yet so much simpler than I could ever have imagined. It comes down to love. The love that created me -- both God's love, and my parent's love-- and the love that sustains me -- both God's love and the love of the family and friends He has surrounded me with.
38 years of discovery and love... that is what my life is thus far. And, to be honest, I'm pretty satisfied with that. Of course, I'm also excited to see what God reveals to me in these next 38.
So, thanks Mom, for enduring the labor pains, kissing the skinned knees, waiting up for me to come home from an evening out with friends, loving me enough to let me move all the way to Austin, and helping me to see not only who I have become, but who I have always been.
And, thanks Father God, for my life, for creating me to be me, for your love, for your ultimate sacrifice, and for loving me enough to share this journey with me.
It's been a really good 38 years!
What has Mom thought since that day? How have these 38 years looked to her? I guess I need to ask her to find out, but heck, it is so much more fun to just guess. I'm thinking she has seen a lot of changes in me since birth. I'm certainly taller now. But I figure she might also say I'm very much the same girl I was when I was little. After all, God knit me in her womb to be, well... me. I think Mom probably saw some of the qualities I have been blessed to possess in my being from an early age. And, I bet she'd share with y'all if you care to ask ways that I exhibited then a few of the less attractive traits I still possess today.
So what has this journey of 38 years been about if I am still Kaylee -- the same Kaylee (although Mom called me Courtney) that Mom gave birth to 38 years ago tomorrow? I think it has been about getting to know my Father God, and myself better each day. Life makes so much more sense looking backwards they say and I think "they" are right. I knew God the day I was born, after all, Christ was my first love, but I didn't really know Him or who I was in Him. Each day I learn that a little more -- who He is and who I am in Him. It is an exciting journey of self discovery and God discovery. It is all so much more than I could ever have imagined and yet so much simpler than I could ever have imagined. It comes down to love. The love that created me -- both God's love, and my parent's love-- and the love that sustains me -- both God's love and the love of the family and friends He has surrounded me with.
38 years of discovery and love... that is what my life is thus far. And, to be honest, I'm pretty satisfied with that. Of course, I'm also excited to see what God reveals to me in these next 38.
So, thanks Mom, for enduring the labor pains, kissing the skinned knees, waiting up for me to come home from an evening out with friends, loving me enough to let me move all the way to Austin, and helping me to see not only who I have become, but who I have always been.
And, thanks Father God, for my life, for creating me to be me, for your love, for your ultimate sacrifice, and for loving me enough to share this journey with me.
It's been a really good 38 years!
Sunday, February 15, 2009
The Good, The Bad and the Ugly... It's all good!
I honestly can say that I don't know what to write. Life seems to be flying by so quickly I can't keep up. God has connected me with some amazing folks these last couple of weeks and I'm learning so much from them and Him. It has been a roller coaster of great ah-has, amazing conversations, some feelings of 'how am I going to know what my next steps are with all this great info pouring in?' and some hard lessons about how I have handled some things this past year on top of it all! I guess the more we learn about the world, the more we learn about ourselves. And, perhaps, the more we learn about ourselves, the more we learn about God and His beautiful nature. Truly, we are made in His image, so when we learn something new about ourself, we learn something about Him. I find this takes two forms... the first is that if we learn something about ourselves that is yucky -- as I have these last couple of weeks -- it likely generated by our brokenness. In facing it and accepting the grace God offers, we can shed that layer, thus getting a little closer to being the person God created us to be. In this process we learn more about who that is and more about the One who created us. The second form is when we learn something about ourself that we like -- as I also have these last couple of weeks -- somehow it is easier to embrace this lesson. When we see something beautiful in ourselves it is a reflection of the beauty of God. Goodness and love are who He is, so when we see it in ourselves, we see a part of Him in us. Those are the fun recognitions. But ultimately, both lessons -- about our brokenness and our beauty -- give us an opportunity to learn more about who we are created to be and to celebrate the God that created us! Cool!
So, I guess I did have something to write today after all! God bless you!!!!
So, I guess I did have something to write today after all! God bless you!!!!
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Time to let go and jump!
I haven't blogged in a while for many reasons. The primary one is that God has been actively moving in me to come to terms with the realization that it is time to transition out of my role at Gateway. I could not share this publicly via a blog until I had time to work through it with Gateway leadership and receive my pastor's blessing. Now that that has taken place I want to share with you so much.
My last day on Gateway staff will be March 15th. After 2.5 years serving with Gateway missions/Mobilization, I will let go and move into a new phase in my life. This year on staff in Mobilization has probably impacted me more than most other years in my life. I will never forget the journey and will greatly miss the team and staff that I love working with. But I am so excited for this next chapter... God is leading me to really focus on a ministry dedicated to assisting, supporting, encouraging and sharing God's love and purposes with refugees.
After a very important meeting last week that helped me to take this step, I had the opportunity to meditate on a verse and journal. I was able to really sit in the knowledge that God is actively at work. Here's what He revealed:
Ephesians 3:20-21 MSG: God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.
My journal entry....
More than I could imagine:
I never knew I would have a heart for refugees. Until a year and a half ago, I did not even know what a refugee was. And, truly, I didn’t know you could unconditionally love someone you didn’t even know or feel joy just by being around them and hearing them speak to others in their language. I did not know I could have a passion for a people group that is truly intoxicating.
I didn’t know a year ago that I could shepherd people. I didn’t know that I’d like being on stage or teaching. I didn’t know that I could share my passion in a way that motivates others. If I had not trusted and taken the job at Gateway, even though it didn’t quite seem to align with this long-term vision of ministry work I sensed God calling me to, I would not have learned these things. The path is not always clear, but in our taking the next step – one step at a time – God reveals as much as we need to know.
That God can provide everything that is needed – that is truly something to see play out. I didn’t know how reliant I am on Him, but I am soon to find out as I step outside the bounds of a typical job with a set income. For so long, I did not know the adventure of following God that I now can attest to. Trusting the whisper, the sign, the Word, the input shared by a trusted friend. Seeking discernment and trusting that quiet voice. Knowing that you know what you know – even when it seems completely illogical. “…His Spirit deeply and gently within us.”
A friend who is developing a non-profit to work with refugees recently shared that organization’s 1-, 3-, and 5-year plans. I was shocked; not because they were so ambitious. In fact, she said, “maybe this sounds unrealistic” as she told me the 5-year plan, but I did not think so. No, I’m coming to realize that truly anything is possible. If God puts it on your heart, He’ll lead the way. But what shocked me, as I showed her a piece of paper that contained the 1-, 3-, and 5-year plan God had shared with me a few months ago, was that their plan for working with refugees was almost identical to that one that God had put on my heart. She and I had never talked about the majority of these goals prior to that evening. Only God could work out a convergence like that! How God weaves things together – is constantly weaving things together – is so utterly amazing to me. It is beautiful. It is a fulfillment of His promises.
Reading His promise in Ephesians 3:20-21, I have to wonder what more He will reveal. His plans are so beyond my ability to imagine; so it is likely I will truly be surprised – as I have been virtually every day since I started following Christ. So suddenly, my wildest dream doesn’t seem so irrational or inconceivable. Suddenly, it is not only possible but only part of the possibilities. God promises to do so much more than we can even imagine. What will He do next?
My last day on Gateway staff will be March 15th. After 2.5 years serving with Gateway missions/Mobilization, I will let go and move into a new phase in my life. This year on staff in Mobilization has probably impacted me more than most other years in my life. I will never forget the journey and will greatly miss the team and staff that I love working with. But I am so excited for this next chapter... God is leading me to really focus on a ministry dedicated to assisting, supporting, encouraging and sharing God's love and purposes with refugees.
After a very important meeting last week that helped me to take this step, I had the opportunity to meditate on a verse and journal. I was able to really sit in the knowledge that God is actively at work. Here's what He revealed:
Ephesians 3:20-21 MSG: God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.
My journal entry....
More than I could imagine:
I never knew I would have a heart for refugees. Until a year and a half ago, I did not even know what a refugee was. And, truly, I didn’t know you could unconditionally love someone you didn’t even know or feel joy just by being around them and hearing them speak to others in their language. I did not know I could have a passion for a people group that is truly intoxicating.
I didn’t know a year ago that I could shepherd people. I didn’t know that I’d like being on stage or teaching. I didn’t know that I could share my passion in a way that motivates others. If I had not trusted and taken the job at Gateway, even though it didn’t quite seem to align with this long-term vision of ministry work I sensed God calling me to, I would not have learned these things. The path is not always clear, but in our taking the next step – one step at a time – God reveals as much as we need to know.
That God can provide everything that is needed – that is truly something to see play out. I didn’t know how reliant I am on Him, but I am soon to find out as I step outside the bounds of a typical job with a set income. For so long, I did not know the adventure of following God that I now can attest to. Trusting the whisper, the sign, the Word, the input shared by a trusted friend. Seeking discernment and trusting that quiet voice. Knowing that you know what you know – even when it seems completely illogical. “…His Spirit deeply and gently within us.”
A friend who is developing a non-profit to work with refugees recently shared that organization’s 1-, 3-, and 5-year plans. I was shocked; not because they were so ambitious. In fact, she said, “maybe this sounds unrealistic” as she told me the 5-year plan, but I did not think so. No, I’m coming to realize that truly anything is possible. If God puts it on your heart, He’ll lead the way. But what shocked me, as I showed her a piece of paper that contained the 1-, 3-, and 5-year plan God had shared with me a few months ago, was that their plan for working with refugees was almost identical to that one that God had put on my heart. She and I had never talked about the majority of these goals prior to that evening. Only God could work out a convergence like that! How God weaves things together – is constantly weaving things together – is so utterly amazing to me. It is beautiful. It is a fulfillment of His promises.
Reading His promise in Ephesians 3:20-21, I have to wonder what more He will reveal. His plans are so beyond my ability to imagine; so it is likely I will truly be surprised – as I have been virtually every day since I started following Christ. So suddenly, my wildest dream doesn’t seem so irrational or inconceivable. Suddenly, it is not only possible but only part of the possibilities. God promises to do so much more than we can even imagine. What will He do next?
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